This Sucks - MS 101

A place to vent -- both the good and bad -- in coping with this life altering disease.

Friday, October 21, 2005

getting ready .. to leave :(

Ok well I finally got enough "guts" to give her the letter no response tho oh well it least I gave it to her right? (Pat on the back) I don’t know its weird I feel like "unwanted" like I know "dad" wants me here and the kids love me but she don’t show anything like she don’t care if im here or not ..... and it’s hard on me cuz when im here im usually with her all the time most times... I don’t know I guess we will have to see .... maybe my letter was like a what ever to her or something I know she has A LOT on her mind!!!! oh well but other than that my eye is still a little swollen and im packing to go to moms I cry a lot now... I don’t know how much I can handle.... it’s sad I sometimes consider ya’ll (my ms internet friends) a lot closer than those I love so much... oh well right life must go on...
Next day 10/20/05
Ok here we go... I leave in 2 days and my damn brain is making me nuts.... my best friend don’t show any emotion at all... im beginning to think that she don’t want me here... witch I don’t really think is true but I would like some re assurance ya know? Help??? my head is making me so fucked up she don’t talk and don’t wanna hear about me and my ms .. Her dad says its cuz she feels bad about it and blocks it out but if im willing to talk about it y cant she be??? oh my.... I think I might try to talk to her when she gets home? What cha think? But I think Wendy will be here and I don’t wanna be mean.. Maybe I can just say I need to talk to you I don’t know!!! ill write more later.. Take care ...be careful...."B"
10/21/05
ok I leave to go back tomorrow.... I desided not to talk with kelly so I guess we will just leave it where it is!!

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